Penisocratic method 3

Shorts for the edification of the curious

In this issue:

• 🍎 Apple Copium: When You Miss the AI Train

• 🥦 Nutri-Score: ESG for Your Stomach

• 🚴 Clip-On Cyclists: Lycra Menace

• 🇺🇸 Elon v Trump: Budgetary Divorce Court

• 💸 USAID: Guilt Grift Götterdämmerung

• 👑 The UK Declares You a Terrorist

Technology

Sex isn’t real, incels find

Apple, which failed completely to catch the current wave of AI, has now published a paper arguing it’s not really AI. Leaving aside the metaphysical Deutsch-core debates whether LLMs can be "true intelligence", the fact is that whatever it philosophically is, it works, it’s improving fast, and Apple completely missed the boat. Their "study" - written by an intern, by the way - is naked cope for this failure.

This just in: incel scientists publish paper claiming sex is overrated and might not even be real.

I have been saying for more than a decade that Tim Cook is bad. Apple has no courage, no vision, and arguably the second most dysfunctionally longhoused woke daycare culture in tech (after Google). The opportunity cost of that much capital and talent being wasted on memoji cringe, VR goggles that cost the GDP of a small country and don’t do porn or games (the only currently viable use cases), and making the Photos app worse is incalculable. Eventually, Elon or Altman will steal their lunch - if we’re lucky. If not, it’ll be China.

Health

Nutri-score is genocide

Nutri-score is an European scheme for labeling food on a scale from A to E (basically from “good” to “bad”). It is also the stupidest thing anyone inflicted on Europe since the antinuclear movement. On paper, it’s supposed to rank healthier things higher. In practice, the criteria appear to be rather different - in particular, it is privileging vegan anything regardless of actual nutrition values, and automatically downranking anything of animal origin. Real examples:

White bread? B.

Nesquik, which is 75% sugar, and much of the rest is soy? B!

Vegan Chili Sin Carne made of sunflower oil and soy? A!

Actual frozen french fries? A!

Cheese? D!

It’s basically an ESG score for food, measuring how much of a xenoestrogenic degrowth Gretaslop you’re eating, and not if it’s healthy (those being diametrically opposed things). As with all ESG or Jim Cramer’s investment advice, use as a reverse indicator. If it says “A”, you’re in danger.

Noise is mind murder

Andrej Karpathy makes an excellent point about the underappreciated impact of noise on public health.

Here’s my least libertarian opinion: we should ban loud motorcycles.

They are not transportation, they are sonic assault devices. They exist specifically to annoy, announce, intrude and disturb, it’s explicitly why the antisocials buy them, and I am okay with banning their fun.

Inflamed prostates in public spaces

Speaking of bikes: viral video shows bicyclist colliding with skateboarder, shitstorm erupts in comments as usual.

Let’s cut to the substance of the problem. Why the fuck is anyone using a racing clip-on bike in a park? Or a city?

He’s not doing a Tour de France on Mont Ventoux, he’s doing a soy latté powered commute to a fake email job in marketing, zooming past toddlers and dogs at 40kph in a public space, and acting like everyone else is the problem. He’s not, as he perceives it, efficiently cutting through the chaos and near-stationary worthlessness of non-player-characters in his single player game, he’s being a menace, most of all to himself - then he cries out it pain as he strikes others.

What is it with (a subset of) bicyclists using shared paths like race tracks, and acting offended anyone else is on them doing the things they’re actually meant for? There is no spiritual difference between this and drag racing in a school zone.

Racing bikes in cities are LARPy fetishism, analogous to dudes wearing special forces tactical gear to Walmart, or scaling the neighborhood walking trail in full Himalayan expeditionary outfits: delusional, overgeared, and wildly out of place. Cosplay with cardio.

“But the skateboarder made a turn” - very slowly. If you’re flying past pedestrians on a racing setup, on a mixed-use path, any collision is your fault, no matter who “suddenly got in your way”, just the way any skiing collision is the fault of the person coming up from behind. Should have moderated speed to the situation. Period. You’re not even supposed to be there doing that.

Maybe they believe clip-on shoes active a no-clip cheat and allow them to drive through obstacles, who knows.

Clip-on bikes in cities are onanism, should potentially be banned, and riding them (especially at high speeds) means anything that happens is the fault of the cyclist.

Politics

MAGA vs Mars: Elon fights with Donald

There was a big shitstorm between Elon and Trump the other day. You can sort of understand it. Elon staked his reputation and took a massive financial hit trying to fix America’s budget, saving 180 billion to date. Fart in a jacuzzi in the grand scheme of things, but a respectable start. Then Donald and the useless GOP in congress turn around and announce 5 TRILLION in new debt. What the fuck is even the point in trying to help them? Of course Elon feels betrayed and taken advantage of.

The GOP, for their part, probably considers the fiscal situation a secondary concern, preferring to focus on deportations and demographics, perhaps assuming a less leaky fiscal sieve with less welfare fraud and public disorder (their assumptions, not mine) will make subsequent consolidation easier. The zombie apocalypse that meanwhile erupted in Los Angeles does lend that view a bit of support. Elon, apparently, is less concerned about the Great Replacement, and more about America’s bankruptcy - which his new plan is to prevent by tripling GDP with robots.

Curious how things will shake out. Never bet against Elon, though.

DOGE defunds grifters hiding behind human shields

Speaking of Elon’s efforts to fix the budget, there’s been much hand-wringing about oh so noble and worthy USAID causes getting defunded by DOGE. Many pictures of AIDS patients denied medicines, who knows if true.

But even if they were - I'm sorry, but the moral responsibility for the defunding of USAID isn’t on the grownups in the room who eventually lost patience and nuked the whole corrupt abomination from orbit, but on the grifting hippies, spies and hereditary upper class faildaughter turboparasites who weaseled their way into organisations nominally providing AIDS medicine to Darfur orphans, got fat on consulting fees putting in 2 hour workweeks, and thought "hehe nobody will dare attack my slacking, grifting and corruption here". Literally hiding their crimes behind the world’s most vulnerable (who may or may not have also sometimes incidentally benefitted, probably more often not), they are the ones who made USAID a legitimate and necessary target for anyone Wishing to Fix Our Shit At Scale. It is their fault that USAID deserved to be destroyed.

The psychological and emotional warfare they launched in response, emphasizing vanishingly rare justifiable uses of funds in a swamp of waste, fraud and corruption, is the austerity playbook all over again - exactly like during the Euro Crisis circa 15 years ago (implying the Euro crisis ever ended rather than being papered and inflated over, lol), they deliberately make fiscal discipline maximally (emotionally) painful for everyone else, and try to make taxpayers beg to give them money again to stop feeling bad. When the people of Europe demanded an end to waste and corruption, European bureaucracies cut first line healthcare, road repairs and grandma’s fuel subsidies, while continuing the actual waste and corruption unabated. When USAID was called out for defrauding trillions, you immediately got pictures of sad black kids in hospital.

Again, it is deliberate psychological warfare and emotional terrorism intended to make you beg to support organized crime. Harden your hearts and ignore it. Better yet, cut their budgets even harder.

British government declares you a terrorist

Don’t worry, they declared essentially everyone terrorists, maybe to make the actual terrorists feel less singled out. The British government came up with a new, expansive definition of terrorism that includes 80% of people in Europe and basically everyone who isn’t blind, deaf and retarded.

If you think the highlighted part is self-evidently true, congratulations, you are somehow morally equivalent or worse than the people blowing up clubs, stabbing commuters and driving into Christmas markets.

Welcome to the regime where defending your heritage is now indistinguishable from blowing it up.

Just to make the irony super clear - according to the fine SIS(MI6)-linked lady (remember the facial expression btw, they all look like this) responsible for this Orwellian agitprop, you are apparently a terrorist if ... you oppose terrorism.

British government says Britishness is terrorism.

Question for future historians: why is the British “Deep State” nexus at the weird intersection of MI5/6, the Masons, civil service, Fabian society and the royals doing this? It’s impossible to miss they’re basically running a grand-treasonous top-down coup against the native population and historical system of government of Britain, using methods that would trigger a UN resolution, if not a NATO intervention anywhere else. In fact, the UK is functionally under a hostile occupation government. What the fuck is even going on there? Who is doing it and why?

The crown isn’t just lying in the gutter, the king is shitting on it.

Wrap-up

Every institution tasked with defending the good, the true, and the beautiful is either asleep at the wheel, actively corrupt, or in LARP mode. Whether it’s Apple pretending AI isn’t real, or Britain pretending you are the terrorist, the throughline is identical: inversion, projection, rot. It’s all noise, racing bikes in parks, Nutri-Slops with A-ratings, everything hollowed out and painted over, cosmetics crowding out essential functionality, pretending to help while actively degrading. The only solution is to build sanctuaries of sanity, tune out the noise, and prepare the ark.